that. just. happened.

How to be Smarter: Don’t think of it as baggage; think of it as perspective.

How to be Prettier: But if you do have baggage, try to limit it to strictly carry-on.

How to be (less) Awkward: Carrying baggage from past relationships is never an excuse for poor, unkind, or jealous behavior in your current one.

www.smartprettyandawkward.com

The feeling of hopeless desperation is overwhelming. Especially when the source of said feeling completely eludes me.

Listening to “Breathe” by Anna Nalick on repeat and sitting and staring at the wall. Still feel like something bad is going to happen, or has happened for that matter, and I can’t do anything to control it.

joeydont:

It’s funny how the word “falling” usually tends to be negative. But when you say, “I’m falling for you” or “I’m falling in love with you” it’s the complete opposite. Maybe that’s why so many people get hurt, they shoulda stopped falling.

That absolutely stopped my breathing for a second. Guess it just hit close to home. Amen.

So weird to come back after not posting for SO long and read how I felt. I still understand why I felt that way. And in some microscopic part of my heart, I do have those feelings. It just seems so long ago.

SO much has happened that I couldn’t even ramble on about it because some of the HUGE things that happened have been overshadowed by new HUGE things. But I guess that’s life, right? People change, things that were once important seem insignificant, YOU change.

Here’s to change.

(I’ll update later with the meaning behind this sudden reappearance.)

God, where is my knight in shining armor?

Why can I not stop picturing the smile on his face as we drove through the ocean? Why would you let him find someone else so easily? Why wouldn’t you make it easier for me to be with him?

I know your plan obviously does not include him, but why not? I felt… no STILL feel an odd connection with him. He’s in my dreams, he haunts my thoughts.

But now there is her. Good Luck Chuck? No, Good Luck Nicole. Sleep with her and the next person you are with will be the one.

I’m afraid. I’m afraid that at any moment this feeling will go away. That at any moment the cute text messages and the lovely phone conversations will end. Goodnight love. You’re amazing. You’re all a guy could ask for. At some point I’m afraid that those are going to just stop. I don’t want them to. I want to try to have a relationship from afar. I want to try to just visit every month. I mean, its possible right? Fairy tales can come true?

Is getting butterflies. Too soon?